How To Build Confidence & Self Esteem

Developing a healthy sense of confidence is one of the most important things we learn in early development. It enables us to face challenges, overcome obstacles and thrive in all aspects of life. As children grow into teenagers, this skill becomes particularly important. If you’ve begun fostering a teenager or recently become a supported lodgings carer you may be wondering how to help them nurture their confidence and self-esteem.

At Orchard Fostering, we’re here to help throughout every aspect of your journey in foster care – from the initial application to advice and resources to support both you and your foster child. In this article, we break down one of the essential aspects of fostering teens: how to help foster children build confidence to take on life’s challenges.

If you’re interested in foster care, please reach out to Orchard Fostering today. We’re available on the phone or via email – you can also fill out a form directly on our contact page.

Why is Building Confidence Important for Teens and Children?

Confidence is a sense of assurance that things will turn out ok, and that if they don’t, you have the ability to cope with it and move on to new experiences. A lack of confidence can result in excessive self-doubt and feelings of unworthiness which make it difficult to navigate life. This affects many life aspects from building healthy relationships to motivation and resilience.

For teenagers, this time in their mental and social development is particularly important and this transition period often means their confidence will be tested in different ways. Making new friends at school, taking on new responsibilities and beginning to decide on a career path about are just some arenas in which confidence is needed. Likewise, for foster children who may have had mixed or difficult backgrounds boosting self-confidence is particularly beneficial in navigating their new situation and managing challenging behaviour.

How to Build Confidence and Self-esteem in Teenagers and Children in Foster Care

Encourage them to ask for help

Asking for help is a skill – and one that doesn’t always come easily! It may seem counterintuitive but asking for help builds confidence because it challenges self-limiting beliefs. Besides, we all need help from time to time and by getting support sooner rather than later, it’s a great way to solve problems faster. You should encourage your foster child to come to you for advice and support with any issues they’re facing and let them know you’re there to listen. It’s also a great idea to lead by example in this and show your child that it’s perfectly ok to need help and ask for it.

Teach them life skills

A lack of confidence is often tied to fear and one of the biggest fears we all experience is fear of the unknown. Being prepared for life’s challenges is one of the best ways to alleviate this anxiety. Give your foster child the best start in life by investing some time in teaching them important life skills. Show them how to cook as you prepare dinner for the evening, introduce them to organizational skills or set aside an afternoon to teach them some simple budgeting skills.

Let them fail

Have you ever heard the old saying that we learn more from failing than by succeeding? Well, it’s true! Failure teaches us many valuable life lessons and its key to developing confidence. Why? Because once we know we can pick ourselves back up, failing isn’t as scary. By learning from our mistakes, we know how to succeed in the future. Try to normalize failure to your foster child and let them see it’s not a bad thing. We all have a tendency to only talk about times when things go right but instead, why not show your foster child when you don’t succeed at something and let them see you overcome it.

Provide support

One of the best ways to build a healthy sense of confidence is knowing there’s someone there to support you if things go wrong. It’s like having a safety net to cushion your fall. You won’t be so afraid to take a leap into the unknown if you know you’ll be caught on the other side. Make sure your foster child knows that they’ll always have someone who still believes in them if things don’t go their way.

Encourage them to try new things

A great way to build confidence is by testing yourself. There’s no better way to do that than by trying out a variety of new things and gaining the new experiences that go with it. Encourage your foster child to take up some new skills to increase their confidence. This could be anything from learning a new language to taking up a musical instrument or trying out a dance class. There’s an endless list to choose from!

Find ways to practice their social skills

Building social confidence is key to navigating many of life’s challenges. There’s a number of ways you can help your foster child practice their social skills. Encourage them to participate in after school activities or sports where they’ll naturally have to interact with other peers. Sign them up for volunteering in your local community or let them find a hobby that excites them and where they’ll meet other like-minded individuals who are passionate about the same things.